We grew up inter-reliant. This could have been due to influencing from alcoholic or narcissistic parents. We have had several narcissistic relationships as a result. Our identity revolves around what we are to other people and what we can give them. This means we are living in codependency. For our personalities to develop away from such a rut, we need to effect a number of ideas. These will help us dig down into our selves revealing our true, beautiful and authentic self.
The first idea is the creation of relationships with ourselves. (Runaway Bride) has a scene where Julia Roberts plays a character who makes an ultimate decision. She decides never to choose eggs as preferred by her partners ever again but to make her own choice. We have to take time in focusing on our preferences, likes and dislikes. We must learn everything about what makes us happy and unhappy. We need to find ways to deal and cope in a healthy manner that which makes us unhappy.
Of crucial import is establishment of personal boundaries. That way, you cease engaging in people pleasing. Forming your personal boundaries involves firmly saying no and drawing your line. An excellent example is firm refusal to do something you have no wish to. It does not matter if the person asking you to manipulates you by commenting negatively. Your relationships shall drastically improve the moment you beginning enforcing your boundaries in this manner.
Trusting and listening to our own feelings and intuition is strategic. We need to observe what are our exact thoughts and feelings. We need to remind ourselves that it is allowable to make our own judgements and form our own opinions.
Honoring someones own intentions and needs is yet another important step. Most co-dependent people make decisions based upon what someone else wants and not for their own betterment. This creates a sense of fear before such an individual utters a word. Such a person must question their intention behind their words or actions. This lets them understand their individual motives and ideas rather than allowing other people define these for them. It assists them in developing self-respect and confidence making it easier to communicate their own needs to everyone else.
Creating your own positive space is another crucial step. You achieve this once you learn to differentiate between supporting someone with a problem rather than taking responsibility for that persons problem. This realization enables you create your personal positive space. Establishment of boundaries where everybody else ends and yours begins happens this way.
Finally, we have to commit ourselves to lifting our self-esteem and self-confidence. Leaving our co-dependent relationship shall take commitment and time. The more we know who we are and what we want, the less we shall let people upset us. It could lead to a year of mistakes. A second learning from and discovering such mistakes. Another year may be about practicing loving ourselves. A fourth year may center on acceptance, solidification on our inner loving kindness and awareness.
Ultimately, we are responsible for our own happiness. What we create in ourselves is later artfully transferable to others. In our dynamic and vibrant world, loving ourselves makes all of us stronger.
The first idea is the creation of relationships with ourselves. (Runaway Bride) has a scene where Julia Roberts plays a character who makes an ultimate decision. She decides never to choose eggs as preferred by her partners ever again but to make her own choice. We have to take time in focusing on our preferences, likes and dislikes. We must learn everything about what makes us happy and unhappy. We need to find ways to deal and cope in a healthy manner that which makes us unhappy.
Of crucial import is establishment of personal boundaries. That way, you cease engaging in people pleasing. Forming your personal boundaries involves firmly saying no and drawing your line. An excellent example is firm refusal to do something you have no wish to. It does not matter if the person asking you to manipulates you by commenting negatively. Your relationships shall drastically improve the moment you beginning enforcing your boundaries in this manner.
Trusting and listening to our own feelings and intuition is strategic. We need to observe what are our exact thoughts and feelings. We need to remind ourselves that it is allowable to make our own judgements and form our own opinions.
Honoring someones own intentions and needs is yet another important step. Most co-dependent people make decisions based upon what someone else wants and not for their own betterment. This creates a sense of fear before such an individual utters a word. Such a person must question their intention behind their words or actions. This lets them understand their individual motives and ideas rather than allowing other people define these for them. It assists them in developing self-respect and confidence making it easier to communicate their own needs to everyone else.
Creating your own positive space is another crucial step. You achieve this once you learn to differentiate between supporting someone with a problem rather than taking responsibility for that persons problem. This realization enables you create your personal positive space. Establishment of boundaries where everybody else ends and yours begins happens this way.
Finally, we have to commit ourselves to lifting our self-esteem and self-confidence. Leaving our co-dependent relationship shall take commitment and time. The more we know who we are and what we want, the less we shall let people upset us. It could lead to a year of mistakes. A second learning from and discovering such mistakes. Another year may be about practicing loving ourselves. A fourth year may center on acceptance, solidification on our inner loving kindness and awareness.
Ultimately, we are responsible for our own happiness. What we create in ourselves is later artfully transferable to others. In our dynamic and vibrant world, loving ourselves makes all of us stronger.
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