Divorce And Grief Counseling Kansas City; Top Therapist Explains The Phases Of Divorce Related Grief

By Sharon Long


Ambiguous loss can bring about a strong feeling of grief, similar to what is experienced when a loved one dies. Irrespective of the reasons that pushed you to filing for divorce or going through with the process, the bottom line is that you would experience loss in one way or another. In most cases, grief is experienced during the divorce process and right after. If you need divorce and grief counseling Kansas City has a decent number of top rated therapists to offer.

The first stage is often denial. This is when you are in disbelief of what is happening and you may even shut out all feelings of being hurt. The truth is that even those who clearly see their marriage coming to an end will still go through the denial stage. How long it lasts may highly depend on whether you saw the end of your marriage coming or not.

Once you are through with the denial phase, you now fall into a chapter of pain and anxiety. At this point, you could begin worrying about what your life will be like without the emotional and financial support of your partner. You may also experience psychological and even physical pain because of all the changes that will take place and how they will affect not only you, but also your kids. Fortunately, it is the pain that enables you to pick yourself up and decide on the best way forward.

The phase that follows is the anger stage. At this point, just about everything will make you angry including the warning signs you saw before marriage and ignored. You will also be angry about the frustrations you silently went through during marriage. Most couples will also be angry that their mess will affect their children.

It is natural for someone to at this point decide to save the dying marriage. This is known as the bargaining phase and it involves giving promises and promising change. Because of all the desperation, you are likely to end up giving unrealistic promises. Unfortunately, bargaining does not always work and you will need to again focus on your future.

The guilt phase then kicks in and this where you think about all the things you would have done different. In some cases, the turn of events can be blamed on both spouses. You should therefore take it easy on yourself to get rid of that feeling of carrying around a hundred pounds wrapped around your ankles. Any therapist will tell you for free that you need to get over the guilty feeling for you to move on.

Divorce grief leaves a person in depression. Unfortunately, this is an inevitable stage, especially if you have not been in the dating scene for many years and you do not know where to begin for you to fill in the void you feel. It is during the depression stage that most people choose to see a therapist.

The final stage involves acceptance. This comes like a breath of fresh air and you finally accept what happened and begin to forge forward. Acceptance often takes place when the body becomes tired of grieving and develops a reliable coping mechanism.




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